Resilience gives you the unshakable perseverance to reach your goals, despite setbacks. Not to mention, it helps you to recover from stressful events, challenges, and even failures.
A resilient leader remains calm under pressure. Emotions don’t rule them. Instead, they roll with the punches. Nothing can stop them, they’re still at it long after everyone else has surrendered.
The best gift you can give yourself is a powerful, resilient mind.
“Persistence and resilience only come from having been given the chance to work through difficult problems.”
― Gever Tulley
Life isn’t pain-free for anyone. No one gets a free ride, regardless of how wealthy or stable their life might appear.
Furthermore, no one knows what will happen in the future, so it’s better to prepare yourself beforehand.
This inner strength will demolish your fears and anxieties so you can handle everything from daily stress to catastrophes.
Here’s how you can build resilience and strengthen your mind.
1. Get a life-changing goal
“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.”
– Helen Keller
Don’t sit back like you have nothing to try for in life because you’ve got a job that pays the bills. Or you married the person you love. Is that all you were born to do? Of course not.
You’re much more valuable to the world than you might think! Although we can all become even better. Only narcissists believe they have nothing to improve. But, they’re wrong, they’re too insecure to admit that they have flaws.
If you don’t have any dreams or goals, stop and think of what you can accomplish that would enhance your life. What would make you happier?
2. What to do when things don’t work out
“You may have to fight a battle more than once to win it.”
― Margaret Thatcher
If you tried to achieve a goal and failed, ask yourself, what can you do better the next time? Toss your ego out the window and write down all the areas you could improve so next time you’ll get a better outcome.
Failures are priceless lessons you must learn to succeed. They aren’t stopping points. So, if you want it bad enough, you can’t quit. Be patient with your process, and become immune to failures.
3. Think positive
“Everywhere man is confronted with fate, with the chance of achieving something through his own suffering.”
– Viktor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning
Those who have lived through horrible situations can still have an optimistic outlook. They know that negative things happen, but they choose not to dwell on them.
Specifically, Viktor Frankl was a perfect example of resilience and mental strength. He was a psychiatrist, an astonishing memoir of his imprisonment in Nazi death camps called “Man’s Search for Meaning.” He wrote about the psychology of people living through the worst scenarios by choosing their thoughts. I highly recommend it!
4. Have an indestructible attitude
“Life doesn’t get easier or more forgiving, we get stronger and more resilient.”
― Steve Maraboli
I know how it feels to go through hell. It seems like everything is falling apart, and you might feel like you can’t go on another day. But, you can’t listen to these thoughts.
I promise it feels so incredible when you emerge stronger and wiser on the other side.
You have the power to change your perspective. So, start focusing on all the things you’ve done right and what you can improve. Think of all the potential you have and what a tragedy it would be if you took it all to the grave.
5. Ignore the competition
“Rock bottom became the solid foundation in which I rebuilt my life.”
― J.K. Rowling
Don’t worry about other people. Obsessing about what others are doing is a distraction that slows you down. It doesn’t make sense to compare yourself with someone because each human on this planet is different. Therefore, you can only compete with yourself.
6. Ignore the haters
“If you’re going through hell, keep going.”
― Winston Churchill
Criticism can be valuable if you use them to improve in order to reach your goal. But, if some troll tells you that you’ll never make it or that you suck, cut them out. Because they just want to rile you up and throw you off course.
Besides, their harsh words are actually what they believe about themselves. They’re upset because they don’t think they can do what you’re doing. But, it’s not about them, this is about you, and no one can stop you from reaching your goal. No one.
7. Change how you respond to setbacks
“I think a hero is an ordinary individual who finds strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.”
– Christopher Reeve
When you’re going through hard times, it’s okay to be angry, sad, or disappointed. So, allow yourself to feel these emotions. Can you fix the situation? If not, then tell yourself it’s okay, but it’s not the end of your life, and there are many more amazing things to come!
8. Stop sabotaging your resilience
“Turn your wounds into wisdom.”
― Oprah Winfrey
Your thoughts can build you up or destroy you. So, never forget how powerful your thoughts are. Don’t allow your mind to wander into darkness. It might seem harmless, but thinking like that will alter your behaviors and could take you down a negative path.
Put an end to all pity parties because making others feel sorry for you ensures that you identify with being a victim. Seeing that, it ingrains your feelings of powerlessness and you become weaker.
Instead, focus on your possibilities and what you do right. Encourage yourself to keep improving.
9. Do what scares you
“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.”
– Nelson Mandela
Resilient, strong-minded people face their fears instead of avoiding them. When you do what scares you, your fear dissolves. What’s more, if you avoid it, the fear grows and becomes more frightening.
In order to squash your fears, you’ll need to put yourself in a scary (not dangerous) situation.
Enjoy the excitement of defeating your anxieties! Do this for long enough and you’ll prove to yourself that you can handle it.
10. Use your sense of humor
“Resilience is knowing that you are the only one that has the power and the responsibility to pick yourself up.”
– Mary Holloway
Humor is a healthy, effective coping strategy for hard times.
If you can laugh during difficult times, you can make any situation less intimidating. For instance, when my husband and I were in the desert for 9 months with no running water. We had to make it a point not to argue because we had a goal. Moreover, we couldn’t afford to add more stress to our lives. So, we chose to laugh instead of ruminating on the circumstances.
Although it was an enormous mental struggle, we both came out of that situation with more resilience.
11. A strong body creates resilience
“We are not a product of what has happened to us in our past. We have the power of choice.”
― Stephen Covey
Resilient people exercise because physical strength helps to build their character as well. Exercise gives them the confidence and energy to tackle new challenges. Moreover, the stress of working out can help people heal from traumatic events and can prevent new ones from happening.
In the end, everyone needs resilience when they experience hard times. What matters is how we perceive those situations and how much we allow them to impact our well-being. So, choose to learn from it, instead of letting it destroy you.
Remember that you’re amazing! Think of the most impressive people in the world, and realize that you’re made of the exact same ingredients. But, you have a unique style that the world needs!
So, make a plan to improve what you need to, then do it. You’ve got this!
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